Season 3

March 5, 2004

In Harry Hill's TV Burp this week, current TV shows like Coronation Street, Emmerdale, EastEnders, Casualty, Heartbeat and The Bill as well as documentaries such as The Badness of King George IV, There's Something About Miriam, The Divine Michelangelo and Britain's Worst Cook. Other things include ‘There's Something About Jesus' (a spoof-take on There's Something About Miriam), a fight between Peter Jackson and Mel Gibson to see who's the better film director, various comic sketches with Jeremy Clarkson and Quentin Willson and all the usual madness.

March 12, 2004

Jokes and gags this time revolve around Heartbeat, Club Reps, Learner Drivers and Casualty. Harry spotted a new character in Coronation Street: a gas canister with gauges that makes it look like it has human features. We also have a sketch on a day in the life of this gas canister and ‘Cooking with the Slaters' (from EastEnders). Harry also wonders who those people are in the Emmerdale title sequence as none of them are characters in the soap. Plus there's a fight between James Hewitt and Kieran Fallon and all the regular madness.

March 19, 2004

Gags and jokes this time include a Woody Allen look-alike in EastEnders, a David Bowie look-alike in Learner Drivers, impersonations in Emmerdale, Frank's death in Footballers' Wives, a new character called Clops in The Bill and a drink called Stelberg in Coronation Street. From Channel 4 documentary Who Kidnapped Shergar?, Harry makes fun of the man in charge of the investigation, Chief Superintendent James Murphy (the fact that he wasn't very knowledgeable about what was going on and relied on sources like the news to provide evidence). We also have a sketch called ‘Murphy and Horse' (featuring John ""Huggy"" McCrirrick) where James Murphy and Shergar go around fighting crime. There's also a fight between Paul Michael Glaser/David Soul and Ben Stiller/Owen Wilson to celebrate the release of the new Starsky and Hutch movie to see which version of the 1970s police series is better: old or new and all the usual malarkey.

March 26, 2004

This time on Harry Hill's TV Burp, stuff ranges from an Avid Merrion (from Bo' Selecta!) look-alike in Heartbeat, a log with shades on making it look like rapper Jay-Z in EastEnders, face transplants and disappearing patients in Holby City, how Fred Elliott tells you what meat he's eating in Coronation Street, dramas such as Footballers' Wives and Murder City and factual shows such as If and A Life of Grime. From documentary Noah's Ark, where Jeremy Bowen (off Breakfast Time) attempts to prove or disprove the bible story, Harry creates his own version: ‘Goldilocks and the Three Bears' where he pretends to be Bowen and attempts to prove or disprove the fairy tale. Plus we have a fight between Bowen and God and all the regular malarkey.

April 2, 2004

This time on TV Burp, Harry makes fun of people sitting still and being silent in the soaps (sarcastically saying that everyone is kept busy) as well as programmes like Footballers' Wives, Coronation Street, EastEnders (a shop called Cost Mart), Emmerdale, The Bill, Club Reps, Taxi Nights and documentaries such as Dragons Alive, Ice Alert and I Met Osama bin Laden. Harry also creates his own ‘If' documentary: ""If… TV Continues to Get Worse"" predicting events and shows in the far future. The fight this time is between the Archbishop of Canterbury and the Footballers' Wives to see who is better. As it is the last episode of the series, the credits are displayed against images of Fred Elliott's face.