Season 13

September 1, 2005

September 2, 2005

September 5, 2005

September 6, 2005

September 7, 2005

September 8, 2005

September 9, 2005

September 12, 2005

September 13, 2005

September 14, 2005

September 15, 2005

September 16, 2005

September 19, 2005

September 20, 2005

September 21, 2005

September 22, 2005

September 23, 2005

October 3, 2005

October 4, 2005

October 5, 2005

October 6, 2005

Jon Stewart and singer David Gray are tonight's guests.

October 7, 2005

October 10, 2005

October 11, 2005

October 12, 2005

October 13, 2005

October 14, 2005

October 17, 2005

October 18, 2005

October 19, 2005

The Rock and 13-year-old piano prodigy Kit Armstrong appear on tonights show.

October 20, 2005

Houston Astros pitcher (and 2006 NLCS MVP) Roy Oswalt presents the Top Ten; with a little help from Dave, Madonna rides a horse for the first time since a much-publicized incident two months earlier; Melissa Etheridge performs "I Run For Life."

October 21, 2005

Gavin MacLeod (in full Captain Steubing regalia) makes a few football prognostications; Al Franken promotes his new book; Al Green performs "Everything's Okay."

October 24, 2005

October 25, 2005

Uma Thurman and Rachel Ray appear on tonights show.

October 26, 2005

November 3, 2005

November 4, 2005

November 7, 2005

November 8, 2005

November 9, 2005

November 10, 2005

During "Audience Show & Tell," Dave meets a couple of film extras; Michael Sessions (the 18-year-old mayor of Hillside, Michigan) presents the Top Ten; Steve Martin sings with a choir and rides a motorcycle built by the Teutel boys.

November 11, 2005

November 14, 2005

November 15, 2005

Over at Hello Deli, a lady from Des Moines, Iowa correctly guesses that Rupert is singing a Toby Keith song; Joaquin Phoenix promotes Walk The Line; Trisha Yearwood performed "Trying to Love You."

November 16, 2005

November 17, 2005

November 18, 2005

November 21, 2005

Dave shocks the audience with the news that Oprah Winfrey will be a guest on the show a week from Thursday; Biff undergoes Lasek eye surgery; George Clooney promotes "Syriana."

November 22, 2005

November 23, 2005

President Bush drops by the theater but somehow gets himself locked out; in honor of Oprah's appearance next week, Dave gives everyone in the audience free vodka and Lipitor; throughout the night, Professor Robert Mundell tells Rodney Dangerfield jokes; Alan abruptly starts singing The Black Eyed Peas' "My Humps."

November 24, 2005

November 25, 2005

Johnny Dark tries to sell Dave a 18-pound lobster; John Malkovich shares an amusing anecdote about his mother; race-car driver Tony Stewart plays "Joe Gibbs or Monkey?"

November 28, 2005

Dave orders some decaf coffee from Starbucks; Dave reveals the giant Oprah photo in the backdrop again, then puts a much smaller photo of Regis right next to it; Amanda Peet promotes Syriana; The Darkness perform "Is It Just Me?"

November 29, 2005

November 30, 2005

December 1, 2005

December 2, 2005

December 12, 2005

December 13, 2005

December 14, 2005

Dave participates in a Holiday toy demonstration; Biff tells "It's so cold..." jokes; Aqualung performs "Brighter Than Sunshine."

December 15, 2005

December 16, 2005

December 19, 2005

December 20, 2005

Tonights guests include Bonnie Hunt and Stephen A. Smith.

December 21, 2005

December 22, 2005

December 23, 2005

January 2, 2006

Dave explains how he ordered Sue Hum to make a cupcake costume just for heck of it; Biff reads a movie review from the newspaper; Heather Graham promotes her new sitcom; Fall Out Boy performs "Dance, Dance."

January 3, 2006

Tonights guests include Bill O'Reilly and Eric Bana.

January 4, 2006

January 5, 2006

January 6, 2006

Johnny Dark "celebrates" 39 years as a CBS page; Alan makes predictions for 2006; The Temptations perform "My Girl."

January 9, 2006

The apparent theme of the night is "Love Train"; Albert Brooks sings "Thanks to the Memories" believing that Dave is retiring; "Laguna Beach" star Kristen Cavallari promotes her new reality show.

January 10, 2006

Dave demands that the O'Jays perform "Love Train" on the show; Alan criticizes "Dancing with the Stars," then starts prancing around in a gold shirt; Scarlett Johansson (in her first appearance on the show in eight years) promotes Match Point.

January 11, 2006

January 12, 2006

January 13, 2006

January 16, 2006

Dave laments the Colts' playoff loss and teases with retirement again; Alan's alter ego "Fat Momma Kalter" storms out of the theater; Matisyahu performs "King Without a Crown."

January 17, 2006

Dave wears the skin of a roasted chicken on his head; Rupert and the models are subject to a pizza taste test; "Is This Anything?" is revived to Dave's delight; "Leyan Lo" (the new world record-holder for solving a Rubik's Cube) fails to beat his personal best and melts down onstage.

January 18, 2006

Tonights guests include Kate Beckinsale and Bob Saget.

January 19, 2006

January 20, 2006

A cop from New Jersey pleads the fifth on "Know Your Current Events"; Johnny Dark comments on Dave's heart; Charles Grodin defends his performance in the 1976 remake of King Kong.

January 23, 2006

January 24, 2006

Dave celebrates 2,500 shows at CBS with "Staffer Memories"; a recent graduate from Penn State is invited to ride a taxi pantsless; Dave and Emma Thompson instigate a pie fight.

January 25, 2006

Esteban sits in with the band; Jeff Altman shares an amusing story about Johnny Carson; Wicked Wisdom (a band with Jada Pinkett-Smith on lead vocals) performs "Something Inside of Me."

February 2, 2006

February 3, 2006

Paul does his "Carnac" homage again during "Stump The Band"; Olympic snowboarder Seth Wescott presents the Top Ten; Pat Farmer drops stale chips and dip onto 53rd Street; Train performed "Cab."

February 6, 2006

Comedian Andy Kindler reports from Super Bowl XL; Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger gets his beard shaved off by Dave and an audience member; Harrison Ford announces that he's in "a bubble of giddiness."

February 7, 2006

February 8, 2006

Biff pretends to report from the Grammys; "Stupid Human Tricks" includes a woman who whistles the theme from The Andy Griffith Show with her toes; The Beastie Boys perform "So What'cha Want" with several audience members holding handheld camcorders.

February 9, 2006

Tonights guests include Senator John McCain and Heidi Klum.

February 10, 2006

February 13, 2006

February 14, 2006

February 15, 2006

February 16, 2006

February 17, 2006

February 20, 2006

February 21, 2006

February 22, 2006

February 23, 2006

Amanda Peet and Jack Hanna are featured guests plus Peter Griffin of Family Guy presents the Top Ten!

February 24, 2006

Tonights guests include Hugh Laurie and Ne-Yo.

February 27, 2006

Tonights guests include Bruce Willis and The Strokes.

February 28, 2006

March 1, 2006

Declaring that there are "more monkeys than ever," Dave meets the 2006 monkey-calling champions; Chef Giada De Laurentiis makes veal scallops for Dave and Sarah Jessica Parker (but not Paul).

March 2, 2006

March 3, 2006

Johnny Dark gives a tour of the theater; "Will It Float?" travels to Trump Tower; Ricky Gervais promotes his new children's book; The Subways perform "Rock and Roll Queen."

March 6, 2006

March 13, 2006

March 14, 2006

March 15, 2006

March 20, 2006

March 21, 2006

March 22, 2006

March 27, 2006

March 28, 2006

March 29, 2006

March 30, 2006

Dave promises a box of Explod-O-Pop popcorn to every member of the audience; Liza Minnelli performs "I'm Glad I'm Not Young Anymore" to celebrate her 60th birthday; Al Lubel riffs on voting and anti-depressents.

March 31, 2006

April 10, 2006

April 11, 2006

April 12, 2006

April 13, 2006

April 14, 2006

April 17, 2006

April 18, 2006

April 19, 2006

Dave sits down with fellow talk-show host Craig Furguson. He also talks with Gilmore Girls star Alexis Bledel, and Tom Russell.

April 27, 2006

Tonights guests include Keri Russell, Brian and Tina Miser and Jerry Lee Lewis.

April 28, 2006

May 1, 2006

May 2, 2006

May 3, 2006

May 4, 2006

May 5, 2006

May 8, 2006

May 9, 2006

May 10, 2006

May 11, 2006

May 12, 2006

May 15, 2006

Dave orders a reluctant Rupert to eat at Ranch 1; "True Tales of the Late Show Interns" expose the dark underbelly of the show's goings-on backstage; Debra Messing discusses childrearing.

May 16, 2006

Dave previews some of the new TV shows premiring in the fall; Bruce Willis tries to hold his breath underwater for nine minutes; Goldfrapp performed "Lost Cause."

May 17, 2006

Tonights guests include Rebecca Romijn from "X-Men 3: The Last Stand" and The Eagles of Death Metal.

May 18, 2006

Tonight's guests include Jennifer Garner from "Alias" and Mary Cheney (author of "Now It's My Turn").

May 19, 2006

Several staffers give advice to college graduates; Martha Stewart finally opens up to Dave about prison life, Criss Angel falls into a woodchipper and survives; the Dixie Chicks performed "Not Ready To Make Nice."

May 22, 2006

Dave sends Rupert into the nearby Jamba Juice; Martin Short sings the virtues of the NSA; Biff comments on the Barry Bonds controversy; James Blunt performed "High."

May 23, 2006

Dave reveals the hot new toys for Christmas (seven months early); Jennifer Aniston dodges questions about her relationship with Vince Vaughn; Rob Zombie performs "America Witch."

May 24, 2006

Several naval officers participate in "Stump the Band"; tonight's "Immigrant Success Stories" segment fails to give a through profile to Dr. Henry Kissinger; Dave and Jesse James discuss welding.

May 25, 2006

May 26, 2006

June 5, 2006

June 6, 2006

June 7, 2006

June 8, 2006

June 9, 2006

June 12, 2006

June 13, 2006

June 14, 2006

June 15, 2006

Iraqi terrorist Abu Hamza Al-Muhajir is spotted in the audience; Robert Duvall discusses some of the movies he has appeared in and his wife�s family in Argentina; Sonic Youth performed "Incinerate."

June 16, 2006

June 19, 2006

June 20, 2006

June 21, 2006

June 22, 2006

For the first time in several years, Dave asks Steph/Monty to imitate her ex-boyfriend's dancing abilities; Al Gore discusses global warming and the current state of American politics; Rock Kills Kid performed "Paralyzed."

June 23, 2006

Sue Hum walks towards a camera onstage for the sole purpose of applying lipstick; Kevin Spacey shares an amusing anecdote about Courtney Love and Peter O'Toole; The Streets perform "When You Wasn't Famous."

June 26, 2006

June 27, 2006

The Family Feud board is resurrected; Dave observes film footage of a monkey undergoing a root canal; Fred Willard tells a dirty joke; Martha Wainwright performed Leonard Cohen's "Tower of Song."

June 28, 2006

June 29, 2006

Dave shows a photo of The Doors in response to a pre-show audience question; Tom Brokaw plugs his new book; Paul Simon performs "Outrageous."

June 30, 2006

July 10, 2006

July 11, 2006

July 12, 2006

July 13, 2006

July 14, 2006

Tonight's guests include Kate Hudson and Patrice O'Neal.

July 17, 2006

A man on the street showers himself under the Late Show Shower-Cam; in honor of her 85th birthday, Dorothy presents the Top Ten; Bryce Dallas Howard promotes "Lady in the Water."

July 18, 2006

Tonights guests include Uma Thurman and Morgan Spurlock.

July 19, 2006

Tonight's guests include Martin Short and Pink.

July 20, 2006

Sue Hum asks Dave if he could make change for a twenty; the show is interrupted by a phony CBS Special Report; Donald Trump is escorted onstage by four Miss Universe contestants; the Sam Roberts Band performed "Bridge to Nowhere."

July 21, 2006

Dave and Gerard discuss Christie Brinkley's divorce before the show; 2006 Tour de France winner "Floyd Landis" takes a victory lap around the theater; Shannon Eis and Dave goof around during a "New Summer Toys" segment; India.Arie performs "There's Hope."

July 24, 2006

July 25, 2006

A short comedy bit involving Dave, Sue Hum, and a bowl of gazpacho is botched; Dave examines Scarlett Johansson's teeth; the Teutel Boys from "American Chopper" show off their newest souped-up cycle, the OCC Splitback.

July 26, 2006

During "Stump the Band," an audience member completely forgets the title of his disputed tune; controversial cyclist "Floyd Landis" is beaten up by the NYPD; The Spinners perform "I'll Be Around" and "Mighty Love."

July 27, 2006

Dave reads out loud the lost letters of Albert Einstein; "Biff Henderson's 'Where Are They Now?'" looks at the late Buddy Ebsen; Tom Dreesen promotes his new one-man show and takes a few lighthearted jabs at his first wife.

July 28, 2006

August 14, 2006

August 15, 2006

Tonights guests include Jessica Biel and Christina Aguilera.

August 16, 2006

Throughout the night, a guy named Bob Zick stands over by the staircase and laughs at everything Dave says; Samuel L. Jackson stars in the much-hyped sequel "Snakes in a Deli"; elderly sock puppet expert Jack Fisette has a demonstration with Dave; Fatboy Slim performed "That Old Pail of Jeans."

August 17, 2006

August 18, 2006

Dave and Steph/Monty play stickball out on 53rd Street; Julianna Margulies discusses overcoming her fear of snakes during a filming of a certain Samuel L. Jackson movie; stand-up comedian "Andy Sansone" bombs in his alleged network television debut; OutKast performed "Morris Brown."

August 21, 2006

"Raul Castro" fields questions for the audience; Chris Elliott auditions for the CBS soap "Guiding Light," Razorlight performed "America."

August 22, 2006

An audience member compares Dave to Alfred E. Neuman; Dave and Paul play "Let's Scare the Hell Out of Rupert"; Busta Rhymes performs "Touch It, I Love My B----, New York S---."

August 23, 2006

August 24, 2006

August 25, 2006