Season 9

December 5, 1981

Sketches include a club where everybody is named after where they were conceived, where about the government white paper on equality, why snuff can be a problem, Piggy Malone and Charley Farley are on the case in the first episode of Band of Slaves, when two telephone conversations become crossed, a problem with body hair, Ronnie tells us about Dagenham, and in the musical finale we head to an Oxford University residential college. The musical guest is Kiki Dee.

December 12, 1981

Sketches include a party where two men have something in common but don't know what it is, there is a message from a spokesman for the Royal Society for Mispronunciation, Piggy Malone and Charley Farley are on the case called Band of Slaves, a couple of yokels are deep in conversation, Ronnie tells us about a supporter of the Fulham football club, and the musical finale is a country spectacular called Grand Ole Opry from Nashville with special guests Slim Pitman and Polly Parton. The musical guest is Randy Crawford.

December 19, 1981

Sketches include a party after a secret visit to Africa, a message by vet Algernon Dinge about the care and treatment of sick animals, the problem with hiking, Piggy Malone and Charley Farley continue on the case called Band of Slaves, there's some domestic trouble between Ethel and Arnold and their pets, Ronnie tells us about how to make an inspiration sermon, and the musical finale is about Teeny Todd. The musical guest is Marti Webb.

December 25, 1981

Sketches include a party with somebody who has very bad breath, some advice from a swami, job orientation for British Rail information, Piggy Malone and Charley Farley continue on the case called Band of Slaves, there's some yokels in the pub, Ronnie tells us about a golfer that he heard whilst at the dentist, and the musical finale is base on the cockney pearlies with special guests Chas & Dave. The musical guest is Sheena Easton.

December 26, 1981

Sketches include a party where a man claims he can guess a person's name by what they look like, there is an appeal on behalf of the invisible, Piggy Malone and Charley Farley continue on the case called Band of Slaves, a very boring man at an accounting office, Ronnie tells us about a new world record, and the musical finale is set in Canada and is by the Royal Canadian Mountain Police. The musical guest is Madeline Bell.

January 9, 1982

Sketches include a bar where a man repeats what the barman and a woman says, we see the Open University's lecture on Intermediate Archaeology Unit Seven, Piggy Malone and Charley Farley continue on the case called Band of Slaves, the two village idiots have a wide-ranging discussion, Ronnie tells us what he does when he doesn't want to be recognised, and the musical finale is by The Hendon Symphony Orchestra performing Clapped Out Classics. The musical guest is Elkie Brooks.

January 16, 1982

Sketches include a friendly meeting to discuss the organisation of village fete, there is a spokesman from the post office, we learn how to get interest on our money, Piggy Malone and Charley Farley continue with the case called Band of Slaves, there's some deep conversation in the pub about medical matters, Ronnie tells us a night out he had at a musical premiere, and the musical finale is by two gardeners in their garden. The musical guest is Clodagh Rodgers.

January 23, 1982

Sketches include one day in the grocery store, a message by a spokesman from the Russian tourist bureau, train stations on a train trip, Piggy Malone and Charley Farley conclude the case called Band of Slaves, taking out an insurance policy to avoid becoming Jewish, Ronnie tells us about his daughters and then a joke that is potentially dangerous, the yokels aren't having a good time with the wife-swapping, and the musical finale is 'Crop of the Flops' hosted by The Two Jimmies with performances by Bad Habits, Chas & Dave, and Adam and the Nats.

December 25, 1982

Christmas entertainment from Ronnie Barker and Ronnie Corbett, with special guest David Essex.